Something Personal

Since this is a series of fortunate and unfornate events among three sisters, I think sharing my most personal journey as a wife and a woman would be approriate. Appropriate, in terms of, because we are far from each other and we use multimedia and social networking as our means of communication. 

So here it goes.

Getting married and wedding are two things that I thought I will get to experience but not like when I dream of travelling to new places. I am always planning my next rendezvous. Not necessarily to a new destination but definitely, a destination.

To cut the introduction short, I am now married and facing the idea of building a family with this loving husband. He is kind. He is patient to a lot of things, not all. 

He sees himself as a father and a provider.

After our wedding, I agreed to the plan to getting pregnant. At that time, one year and four months ago, I was only thinking of baby names. I was not counting my cylces. I was not anything like that. To me, I was in the fun of making babies. Excuse me, little sisters. Hopefully, I am not making you both too red of a blushing. 

What's my favorite baby name? Stella. Stella Grace. To tell you the truth, I am not privvy to have a baby girl. Baby boy will work for me.

Time out. I also have to let you know that my husband and I don't live in the same city, not in the same country. So imagine our creativity to spark romance all the time.

Anyway, we were able to get together for 4 four months straight this year. We counted days and we observed color and body temperature. I felt like I lost my sweet husband. He was so consumed of the idea to get me pregnant. It was irritating.

We did finally get pregnant. It was last August 25, 2012 that a little thing with my pee told us YES+. I cried and he laughed. But I was also bleeding at that time. He was so excited. I was so scared. 

By that Monday, we saw my doctor and she said your cervix is still closed. Lets monitor your blood count and hormones. By Wednesday, I lost the baby.

I cried so hard. 

I never thought I wanted it as bad as my husband. 

I cried so hard for a missed chance. 

I cried so hard for that little seed.

Now, I am more excited and a little giddy of the idea that I can get pregnant but I just need special things to make it successful. 

Now, I am praying and lifting it all up to Him. Praying for this miracle of life to be blessed upon my husband and I and to the rest of our families.